How to Properly Insult a Democrat

Greta Thunberg introduces her zero-emissions car with tailpipes on the inside

There are just so many ways to fight climate change and every day new solutions seem to be popping up. However, most are dropping by the wayside such as massive sun-shielding satellites, cloud producing airplanes, etc.

Though battery technology is coming along it has quite a ways to go. If we are to be perfectly honest here, without a massive expansion of our nuclear power generating capabilities, electric vehicles are coal or natural gas-powered.

Of course, the Ass-Burgers heroine of the story is none other than Greta Thunberg. Her idea of embedding small nuclear charges inside active volcanoes producing massive supervolcanoes had a few glitches. 1) It would create a ‘nuclear winter’. 2) All plant and animal life on the planet would die. Surprisingly, not a lot of support.

However, her latest ideas have garnered considerable interest from Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Bernie Bros alike. The idea is to vent tailpipes directly into cars, trucks, and buses. GT’s transportation reporter, Toots Haulaway, did voice some concern regarding Carbon Monoxide. She was told that presently, only Democratic Socialists and Climate Activists have embraced the idea. They felt that the Carbon Monoxide might encourage some people to work from home. Maybe. It would also slow down traffic as most people would be passed out. Less gasoline burned. Brilliant.

We here at GT congratulate Greta and can only encourage Bernie and AOC acolytes to get involved in this innovative and forward-thinking technology. We’re right behind you on this one. Way behind.

Published by Axel Thomas

An International Sensation, author, lecturer, and disestablishmentarian whose talents and accomplishments have made him a household name and is considered a Deity in most countries. Also a Professional Goofball living the dream in Southwest Florida.

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